It is about power and control, not about respect and love. Many people assume that if they are not being physically abused, then they are not experiencing abuse.
That is not the case. Rejecting — Telling someone that they are worthless or that no one else will want them. Telling a child in a variety of ways that he or she is unwanted. Ignoring — Being physically present but emotionally unavailable or failing to provide nurturance.
Isolating — Keeping someone through manipulation or intimidation from friends and family or peers and independent activities. Humiliation or Degradation — Calling someone names, making fun of them in private or public situations, forcing someone to engage in embarrassing behaviors. Demonstration of power and threats — Using threats to reinforce control such as threatening to leave, threatening to kill themselves or you.
In a healthy relationship, you and your partner have the following basic rights Evans, :. What Is Emotional Abuse? Does someone in your life frequently criticize you, humiliate you, or undermine your self-esteem? Do they ridicule you for expressing yourself? Do they isolate you from friends, family, or groups? Do they limit your access to work, money, or material resources? Do you feel the relationship swings between extreme closeness and emotional distance? Try thinking about your anger tactics in reverse.
Bash says. If you realize that you're trying to scare your partner into agreeing with you or giving you what you want, then that's a major sign you should change your communication style.
Being condescending to your partner may feel like an easy defense mechanism, but it can be a really destructive behavior in your relationship. Threatening a break or ending the relationship completely is not something to be taken lightly. If this is something you've done in the heat of an argument, or do repeatedly, you may want to think about what that means in a larger sense.
If you've ever been on the receiving end of a backhanded compliment, you know just how hurtful they can be. If you talk down on your partner by using backhanded compliments, then, it may be a sign you're being verbally abusive. Not as dry as last time you made it. Name calling is one of the more serious communication mistakes in a relationship. And if you call your partner names regularly, you may be being verbally abusive. A lot of the time, this behavior comes from frustration.
What if you took responsibility for what you really desire for the relationship? What if you owned the wish and committed to articulating it as a positive hope? Sound familiar? Then play back the recording and see how it sounds from another perspective — you might be surprised.
When you feel attacked, it may be tempting to punch back by criticizing your partner for something they did. But try not to stoop to their level. You may be able to figure out what veiled request your partner is making with their criticism. Need help?
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